A Killer Party: Writing a Murder Mystery for My Birthday Celebration

What does a retired theater kid, horror-movie-lover, and obsessive writer do for her birthday when it falls on a Friday the 13th? Write a murder mystery and involve all of her closest friends, of course!

If you've never attended a murder mystery, you may not know that you can purchase a pre-planned party-in-a-box from dozens of retailers and Etsy creators. While many of them are fabulous and make your life simpler, there are serious drawbacks to hosting a murder mystery this way.

• The guest list. Boxes often have a pre-set number of characters that you can include. Even a range (8-10) can feel limiting when some people can't make it and you need to invite only one more person to get to the proper number.

• Cancelations. The way many boxes are designed, you may not know who the killer is until near the end of the party. That can be complicated if someone cancels last-minute. You'll need to find a quick replacement or have someone play two characters in order to make sure you get all the information in the missing guest's materials.

• Less flexibility. I also find that sometimes the kinds of characters included are difficult to assign to my friend group. Maybe I have a lot more girl friends than guys, but the written cast is split evenly. Or, maybe there are characters who are married/dating, and I have to make sure to assign those character to a real couple or friends who are comfortable playing a romantic role with one another.

• Sometimes, they're just not that interesting. It's true. The perk of writing your own story is that you get to make it whatever you want it to be. You decide the setting, the character dynamics, what kinds of things can be clues, who lives, who dies, and the entire structure of the evening.

After having hosted and attended several murder mystery parties and making notes about what I enjoyed most and what I wish was done better, a dream began percolating. Sometime in the last couple years, I decided that I would one day write and host my own murder mystery. This year, I finally made it happen.

Naturally, writing your own party has its challenges.

• Time. Writing the character sheets, clues, and story was an entire project by itself. The time spent on the writing was competing with the time spent planning the food, drinks, decorations, costume, and everything else that goes into hosting. It's not something you can throw together in a week. I started planning a month before my party, and I still felt I could have used more time.

• You'll know all the answers. I personally didn't mind this piece, but there is a real question of your own involvement in the festivities when you write your own mystery. In my case, I chose to be the person who is killed, and I was around as a ghost for the remainder of the night. I snuck around passing out clues, and I wrote in a fun addition where the guests could ask me yes or no questions from beyond the grave (if they held a quartz crystal and spun around three times first). But you'll need to decide how to be involved in a way that is fun for you.

• Materials. The best thing about the boxed kits is they usually come with nicely designed booklets and envelopes for each character with their character information, clues, or different instructions all in one place. You can create this for your guests if you have the time, energy, and money to print and create booklets. I printed my information on regular paper and passed them out without much fanfare. It wasn't the most aesthetically pleasing solution, but it was a low priority for me in the grand scheme of the party.

If you think you're ready to try writing your own murder mystery party, here are the top five things I learned during my first attempt:

1. You need your guests' full participation. When I asked my friends to RSVP (two weeks in advance), I asked them to be very clear whether they'd be able to be at the party by 6:45 and stay through the end at 10. This helped me determine who could play main characters and who would be more observer/investigator roles. I sent out the rules and the basics of the setting well before the party to get everyone interested and starting to think about their costumes. I also asked for their input by creating a character form where they could share the basic character traits they'd like to have and whether they were comfortable playing the killer.

2. A smaller cast will make your life easier. But, if you have a lot of people (I ended up with almost 25!), you can simplify your story by choosing fewer main characters to be directly involved in the murder plot. I made the mistake of trying to write complicated storylines and secrets for nearly 20 people, and while I know they enjoyed having deeper character backgrounds, the overall mystery became a bit thinner due to having so many alternate storylines and secrets to discover.

3. Intentionally reveal big clues. I think the best choice I made for the party was deciding to bring the guests together several times after the 'murder' for clue reveals. I passed out clues to 2-5 guests a few minutes before the reveal, and they would each present what I'd given them to the entire group. This helped me keep some amount of direction over the story, and it also gave more guests an opportunity to play a part in the plot, even if their character might not have been involved directly.

4. Don't let it drag on. In my experience, the best murder mysteries keep a quick pace. From the moment of my 'death' to the murderer confession was just under three hours. We had a little time in the beginning to mingle, and we spent some time at the end presenting awards. Everyone knew that the mystery part of the evening would be done by 10:00, which kept them focused on solving the mystery and alleviated any fears that we might have been investigating all night.

5. Don't be afraid of things going wrong. They will. There hasn't been a single murder mystery I've attended where I figured out who the killer was without someone accidentally saying something they shouldn't or being a terrible liar. As in the real world, your guests will get caught up in the misdirections and distractions you set for them (or ones they made up all by themselves!). You simply cannot control everything that will happen. Do what you can to lay out helpful clues, but don't stress too much about making the mystery the best puzzle your friends have ever seen. The fun of these parties is primarily in the acting and theorizing. If you keep it entertaining and make sure your friends feel involved, you'll all have a great time, whether or not the guests actually figure out the answers on their own.

So, what do you think? Are you brave enough to give it a shot?